Dwelling into Memories

From time to time, life gets monotonous and then when I get tired of wandering here and there , I explore my memories. The connections, the experiences, the moments, the life all comes back to me and I feel alive. We are blessed to have a mind to record and re-live times that were there and the happiness that they brought. By writing small details of good memories, you can always touch those paths which your mind might have forgotten but the diary didn't. Walking on those paths again might be saddening because they are just a part of your diary now but at the same time, I think, they are strengthening because they give you satisfaction that even if it was for once, you did get the opportunity to experience such joys and they give you hope that Life has the capability to bring much more.

Every single life is special because it was given as a blessing from Allah and though it might seem to us that because we are not Quaid-e-Azam or Helen Keller or Lady Diana, we have achieved nothing special, it is not the case. All the lives in this world are connected with each other, my being might have had a positive impact on A's life and A's life on B's and B's on C's and so goes on the circle of life. That, in turn, makes us all important in our own special way.

From memories to life to philosophies, my mind is drifting off again. I will go now but leave you to wander off in your best memories for at least the next 5 minutes. Re-connect, enjoy and be thankful!!

The Happy Place ?!!

Some times in life, you want to go to a place, where there is only nature, you and God. No other   thing and no one else around you. I think that can be called the happy place sometimes. I have a vision of my happy place, I think you do too? I love sea side so that always has to be an active component of my happy place vision. I like how the waves make a ripple, and how life seems so big and so small when you stand in front of the open sea. It feels like it calls on you, to me at least it does seem so. This idea scares me and makes me wonder too. We are all born to live and die alone. That is the natural instinct, though to survive we need to make contacts but in essence the soul aches for peace with one's ownself and not with the the whole world. Ever wondered why? I wonder that often and again.

Back back but hey, am I really back?

It feels like an eternity since I have penned down my thoughts and I think I did miss it terribly. Well there is no better reason to it other than this that I was just trying to get that person out of me, that person who writes and likes writing.

Sometimes that feeling of not knowing what befalls you, feels good and some times when you see those dangers zooming in, you feel anxious and restless. These days I am turning on to a new page of my life, well not really very new but yes some small changes await me like shadows in the dark. I can't see them clearly but I can sense their existence and that gives me excitement and fear both at the same time. The unpredictability of life makes its much more worth living. This makes me think the same thing which I thought in the morning today that life is so beautiful, so colorful, so vivid. I hope we all get a chance to live to our best as that is the biggest blessing one can yearn for.

Do you know how interesting an organ the brain is? It connects so many small terrains of thoughts and gives you flashbacks of what is stored in your memory in a time span of just a few seconds. My husband saw a train today and smiled. I asked him what did he see? He told me that the train reminded him of a friend he met on the train, then his brain went on thinking about the last time he met that friend, which reminded him of one of the restaurants where they met and that reminded him of the manager of that restaurant and how that manager had cracked a joke, and that joke was the reason behind his smile. Weird no!!? I mean yes, this is our amazing organ at work. Even walking, eating, moving hands everything is guided by what out brain tells our body. Blessed creatures are we! I count this all as blessings from our creator which we of course take for granted many times.

Anyways, I think this is enough of my random thoughts spilling out for one day, I will save the rest of my raving for another time. Have a good night reader!

As if I am in a flitting dream ...

Lately I have started to ponder upon this 'time' thing more and more. Have you noticed how quickly the time is passing? I see my life for instance, how it has changed within a span of just 1 year. A careless kid, much loved and pampered, suddenly has become a responsible young lady managing her own home now. My family, whom I grew up with for so many years and never noticed the changes time was doing to us but now when I am away from them, I can see it all. As a spectator I can easily comprehend how every one is growing and at what speed time is passing. My little sisters born in front of me now are achieving great feats in life, my cute niece just 6 months old on my wedding, now got her first toy car and proudly the youngest member of her pre-school class. I mean isn't it amazing how this time is just passing at an unimaginable speed?

As the time passes, you also learn to let go of previous 'times' and move ahead with the stream of life. At this time I am reminded of this following beautiful quote from one of my favourite movies titled 'The Lovely Bones',

Susie Salmon: "These were the lovely bones that had grown around my absence. The connections, sometimes tenuous, sometimes made at great cost, but often magnificent., that happened after I was gone. And I began to see things in a way that let me hold the world without me in it."

Perhaps I can appreciate this time passing due to one more fact which is this that I do have a lot of 'time' these days in particular to think about life. Sad but true that our busy lives just doesn't give us enough time to think about such things and appreciate the importance of every second that goes by.

I guess when we would die, most of us would agree to this saying about life from the same movie mentioned above,

Susie Salmon: "I was here for a moment, And then .... I was gone."

So everyone! in short, life is very small. We should live, feel, do, as if there is going to be no next moment. I guess then we would be more satisfied than we are now and what is more a blessing than contentment of the soul.

The Light Around Me

There are so many times when I feel like penning down my thoughts and feelings but the absence of my PC or note pad makes me feel kind of crippled at those times. Those are the times when I just 'feel' the beauty of what I wanted to express in words. There are so many feelings we get through out our lives. Some are good, some are bad, some are expressable and some are not. I also 'feel' that at times I take this feeling sense of me for granted. Actually there are other things like this that I take for granted as well and dont thank my creator for the small blessings I have. Indeed, he is the one who can give and take everything but thanking him is what we should do as our duty towards him.

Just a few hours back, I had a fulfilling meal and now I am just staring out my bedroom window onto a sunny afternoon. The sun rays make my window sill look like it is made from gold and the shadow of the window on my wall looks like some one has caved a no. 11 on it with a shimmering orangish yellow light bulb. Life is beautiful, yes it so is ... there is so much to see, feel, sense and be thankful for yet our over indulgence in whining over small things makes us blind towards the beauty all around us which is definitely much more bigger than those petty petty things.

Sometimes....

I was sitting in the quiteness of my parent's home terrace and sipping in the serenity of the surrounding with a tinch of the typically soothing 'Karachi' night air, leaving far behind myself the rumblings of the ever alive city. It was a calm sensation that hugged me gently leaving me complete and incomplete in the same point of time. There was a scenic view in front of me where there was this white fluffy cloud whose edges were marked by the pure white light of the half moon partially visible due to the huge plam tree standing still in the neighbourhood since my child hood days and which was then obscuring my full view behind it. The voices in the background of the television set and my family made me feel secure somehow.

I have experienced this moment of calmness many a times living practically half of my life in this place and this familiar view from the terrace never failed in making me feel good. I realize that its these 'some times' of life that we might not remember the next hour or the next day but they are the ones which are so highly needed in the busy world we live in these days. We don't know when our sacred horse will fall down in the horse race we run every second of our existence but atleast we should have a heart to give the horse a break from the chaotic picture he is in mostly. I hope I am making sense to you all but my point is simple, life should be taken seriously as far as achieving its purpose is concerned but other than that the lightness of its essence should be enjoyed too. Life is too short seriously so why not live it in a happy way so that your creator also feels happy that he blessed you with this wonderful gift.

P.S. for those of you who don't know which place is Karachi, let me just say one thing that its the most happening city of the country 'Pakistan' :)

The Voices in the Mind

There comes certain instances in life where you are so engulfed in the mist of emotions that you forget the reality of the situation that you are currently in. The only sound you hear is what the voice in your mind tells you and that voice is being instructed by the winds of heart. If there is another voice in your mind telling you just the opposite of what the first voice says, your conscience is still alive and your soul is still yours otherwise you have lost yourself in the chaotic world of thoughts. The hard fact is that losing yourself is the most painful thing you can experience ever.

I personally feel that if you are losing yourself due to anything, that chapter in your book of life should be torn apart gradually and you should add a new chapter by yourself at that place, a chapter that makes you feel good and happy, a chapter that brings out the best in you because remember 'YOU' are precious and nothing can change this truth.

Cherish-able

Last saturday I felt like writing down so much about what I saw but unfortunately I didn't have my blog access at the place where I was and then I got caught up in the entanglements of life and coudn't write for one more day, but the memory of what I saw kept on pushing me to pen it down and feel its beauty again.

So it was a bright morning with a welcoming sun and a few threatening clouds. A cool breeze was blowing which felt to be freshening up my senses. I felt happy just seeing such a bright day. Small deal it may seem, but we really do take some of the huge blessings of God for granted, because if we come to think of it , there are many who cannot open their eyes to the beauty around them. Life is a teacher I think, every moment you learn something yet like a bad student, we tend to forget it the next moment but sometimes the lesson sticks to our mind and can do wonder if we actually take advantage of it.

I walked a few steps further and saw little stalls of vegetables and other eatables stocked down the lane. People from all different walks of life, with all different good and bad things going on in their lives were standing there, buying their needs. I could hear the sweet chirpy laughter of cute kids all around and then as if this was not enough, I felt a drop of water caress my head. Yes, God added to the scene by adding some rythm of rain, in midst of which I could still see the golden Sun. From here, I could also see the artistic stairs to some old building and could hear the buzzing of new inventions like buses/cars in the background adding some reality to reverie I was in.

I wanted to stay in this scene for ever but time was ticking and I had to move forward with the flow of life.

All around me I felt a beautiful and very powerful energy, a memory which I will cherish for times to come. Some times a small thing also makes a big impact on your soul. Some times even words don't do justice to the feeling you had at a particular moment.

I hope that while reading my post , you also have been able to feel the pure magic or even some part of it , which I felt when I viewed the scene beyond me on that sweet saturday morning.

Facebook is Good!

While just randomly clicking on profiles on facebook, I came across this probable teenager's (atleast she looked like a teenager in her profile picture, don't know for sure though) profile and saw these lines in her 'about me' section ,

Play The Moments
▌▌ Pause The Memories
■ Stop The Pain
◄◄ Rewind The Happines

These 4 lines portray a good summary of how we should play our life reel. They got me into thinking and I felt good in the end.It would feel nice to remember them each morning before starting my day off.

the free bird

Sometimes in life you just want to fly away .... away from everything... the ryhthm .. the noise... the talks.... even away from life ... like a bird ..like a free bird... its weird... the mere thought of independence in its full form gives you both ..pleasure and discomfort ... its this life that make you alive... and sometimes its this life which makes you dead.. ok so enough with the vicious circle of life and life but really it feels so weird at times.

I remember the heroine from the movie 'forest gump'. She always wanted to fly out, at all pushing times of her 'life', fly freely like a bird, but have we ever thought why do we want to do the flying and why we actually don't?

Maybe its the fear of the unknown that stops our feet from crossing that thin line between the familiar world and the unfamiliar world or maybe (which I think is more plausible), its the song "can't live with this world and without this world".

I know it sounds kind of all mixed up but it is actually the connections you form with the very familiar 'at times really weird' world that keeps you from flapping your wings to go some where else. Connections ..ummm .. real important word .. makes me just ponder ...because they are also the reason due to which we want to flap our wings in the first place ... wickedddddd.. ain't it??!

Its Just One Of Those Days

Today was definitely an off day for me. Pink seemed Grey, White seemed black, Light seemed dark and flowers seemed to be as thorns. Why was it that way is a very good question and deep within I guess I know but why am I so lazy some times ? I don't like it but I cant give up on it so easily as well. Procrastination is the 'in' thingy for me mostly which is quite irritating but arrghh! life as they say is never a bed of roses to begin with.

But the good thing about life is that you never know what it has in stored for you tomorrow. May be I wont be happy the next day or may be it would be the best day of my life... so keeping that optimism , you move forward in life. Things start seeming better and heart starts feeling light. What a mystery life is :) !!

My first one !!

Asalamualaikum , Hi , Hello , Bonjour and all the other greetings in the world !!!

Know what, few years back this was the last place I thought I would be in, but with the passage of time, I realized that an outlet for whatever you feel & think is so defintely needed in a world so fast as now and for a person like me who uses internet frequently, blogging was definitely the best option. SO here I am , writing my first entry here and pretty excited too :).
There are so many things to pen down , so many things to say , so many emotions to share, and so little time. No, by that time thing , I dont mean anything philosophical but just this that I have to go back home from work right now. Some times I wonder how simpler this life would be if I had no restrictions and no boundaries binding me. If it was just me and my little independent world , what would have my soul felt then, probably ..... emptier.
Ok , so I lost track again , where was I actually ?! ....... yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ..I was about to leave my work place. Hmppphhhh SO I guess this is it for now...
Would log back in a while , till then take care who ever is reading this post and to me I would just say ' my mind ...take rest please ... , you seriously need it' :P !!! hehe ..